As I mentioned in the last post, Lucy had a lot of quality friend time in June.
I've never been as grateful for friends for my children as I am for Lucy's friends. They are true gems and as sweet as they come.
I'm so extra thankful for them because I know that Lucy isn't new to being left out in bigger groups and I'm sure there's more to come. She is SO social. She always wants to play. Sometimes I'll notice her being so excited to see someone at school or just in passing. It fills my heart to overflowing when the kids she's so excited to say hi to match her smile and get excited to see her too. It dashes my heart to pieces when they ignore her or start talking to someone else instead.
It's ok, it really is. Every kid gets left out once in a while in life. That's just life. Every single one of my kids have felt that before. Kids are just trying to find their way in life, and learning so much along the way. Everyone is different including Lucy and everyone is just finding friends they relate to most, especially at this age. Which makes me extra grateful for these sweet kids who are so nice.
But long ago, I learned so much when my friend was talking to her son who was so sad he had been left out.
She told him to always remember how he felt right then.
She told him it's good to feel that way every now and again because it will help him to have the empathy to never, ever make someone else feel that way.
I've used that wise wisdom a lot with my kids.
So when Lucy wouldn't include my friend's little boy in the fort she and her friends had made the other day it kind of broke my heart. I know she's still learning as are all these kids, but for some naive reason I figured that because she knew how it feels to be left out, she wouldn't do the leaving out. So wrong. Maybe she felt superior that she could be on the top of the food chain doing the leaving out. Maybe she just let her natural instincts kick in. Maybe I have a lot more teaching to do. (Ok, not maybe, for sure.)
But the whole scenario just made me think a bunch more about how dearly I want to deliberately train these kids of mine to always "love more" and be inclusive. That's what all mothers want, right? Loving and being inclusive is what makes the world go around after all. And if they can learn it young, they will be so much happier adults.
After a little chat Lu and I marched that cute little teary-eyed boy over to the "fort" which led to these smiles:
...and this funny note Lucy worked all evening on: