Tuesday, February 22, 2011


Last week Lucy gave us a good scare.

She started throwing her signature tantrums again in full force. And anyone who knows Lucy knows she's got more "tantrum talent" in her pinky finger than most of us have in a lifetime.

She angrily swatted away people who were kind to her or who were trying to help her.

She was entirely impossible to be reasoned with.

And she would NOT stop whining or crying all day long for days and days in a row.

She basically reverted back to her old "monster" self from over a year ago:Dave and I wracked our brains to come up with a solution, but our ears were ringing so much from all her crazy antics we could hardly think. She was killing us.

I finally made the correlation that she started this new craziness around the same time she started this new "dietary supplement" from her new doctor. When I called to ask them if this could be true or just a fluke of timing, they told me it was definitely her new "stuff."

My question is this: Why did they not brace us? Why did they not warn us to get out our ear plugs and take her actions with a grain of salt while she went through what they call "detox" instead of just letting us worry our hearts out?

And my second question is: How have we let ourselves take for granted what an angel she has become over the last year?

She is kind to her friends and she's good at taking turns.

She always says please and thank you.

She snuggles up with her Dora and goes right to sleep when it's bedtime (as long as we do our regular bedtime routine first).

She laughs at jokes, and even makes them up sometimes.

She comes downstairs each morning and proclaims "Good Morning!" to all of us in her sweetest voice.

She can reason things out and she makes me want to kiss her cheeks off all day long.

All that along with the fact that she's a great cupcake maker.
She can keep herself quite busy doing the things she loves.Mmmmmm. Don't you just want a bite of that colorful thing?
I'd personally just like to take a nibble on those cheeks...

Yes, it's true that she has turned from a monster to a little angel over the past year.

And although I would never have thought in the middle of her rough couple weeks lately that I'd be thankful for her horrible behavior, I am.

Because it made me realize how great she's doing.

I am SO grateful to see a vivid contrast to all her progress.


  1. That's always the test isn't it, to keep the right perspective. Glad she's made so much progress! - btw, I found your blog through Mormon Messages. Love your mom's book "I didn't plan to be a witch" - I saw myself in lots of those stories. Love the pictures you take - I'm hoping to have a great camera someday!

  2. So glad all is well. I hate it when something is "wrong" with one of my kids and I can't figure out what it is. Hopefully, now that you know what was causing it, all will settle down, and that adorable smile will be back!

    Hey, I am planning to go to TOFW in Oklahoma City this May, and just noticed that your mom and you are presenting! I can't tell you how excited I am! So awesome!

  3. Thank you for all your honest blogposts! I have two little cousins who are autistic, so I know just a bit about tantrums. And you're right about them making you appreciate the good times and the progress they have made!

  4. Therein lies the million dollar question Shawni.
    Why don't doctors tell you to buck up 'cause you're in for a wild ride?
    Because what We presume is common courtesy or common sense is presumed as common knowledge to Them.
    I have long since learned to act as my own advocate when it comes to healthcare and dealing with medical staff and the what all the entails. It took a very long and very painful lesson, but I've learned.
    I hope Lucy will be back to her sweet self again soon.
    I love that when she smiles her grin is so big that her beautiful little eyes are almost closed.

  5. You are such a great mom...taking with a grain of salt what Lucy can't help. As hard as it is.

  6. It really is amazing the progress that they make. Being around Savannah all the time I don't notice it as much but, our friends and family tell me all the time that they can't believe it! They are so special!
    I'd love to know if, you don't mind telling me what are they putting her on? They have told me that they don't want to put Savannah on anything yet. I'm just curious. I thought they were too young.

  7. I LOVE that first pic of Lucy..it's my favorite. She is just so darn cute. I hope she adjusts to whatever she has to soon, for your sake!

  8. So sorry you weren't braced! We started new supplements as well this last week and Tate was nuts! But, we persevered and this week is much better! Detox is horrible but so very worth it. Don't give up! They told me in the beginning that you can do it slowly or bear through it and get through it quicker. Wish they gave you the same advice. Hang in there. It will be so worth it in the end.

  9. Oh Shawnie,
    I want to hug you and Lucy right now. My daughter's special needs are very different... but I think the "mom feelings" that go along with it are a lot the same.

    We went through something very similar last year. My heart goes out to you. What I learned from the whole thing (you probably already know ;)... is not to trust the "experts" more then I trust my instincts.

    NO ONE knows my girl better then I do. No one cares more when something that is "helping" her one way effects her another like I do. No one FEELS it... her frustration, her pain, her fear... like I do.

    For us, it was a horrible experience... but it was SO worth it. It taught me what kinds of side effects we (SHE) can live with... what kind of "help" we are looking for...

    I think you know a lot more about this then I do. I read your blog for the inspiration :) I just want you to know I've been there... and I feel for you.

    You and your girl are in my prayers.

  10. Hey Shawni I am hoping this finds you with a happy Lucy! I still have those bookmarks if you want them. My email is amym.gregory@gmail.com

  11. Hang in there Shawni!
    Let's plan a fun photoshoot soon. It's been too long. Let me know when you have room in your crazy schedule.


  12. Oh my, I can relate to being grateful for a bit of horrible to recongize change. I have one daughter that I think might be bi-polar but she is only 7 so it is hard to diagnose at this point, but sometimes I have a moment when I look back and see where we used to be and where we are and I am so glad we are not where we used to be and I am amazed and thankful we made it to where we are because I wasn't sure sometimes if the two of us would make it to her being 7 back when she was 3 and 4.

  13. What a beautiful post! We love that girl! And her parents. She is one lucky girl! Good luck with increasing the "vitamins". Can't wait to hear the results of the blood tests!

  14. She is sooo cute and love how long her hair is getting...I have learned through the years that sometimes Dr.s are very frustrating and don't always do the right thing...sorry you had to figure that out on your own!


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