Tuesday, November 17, 2009

the "big talk"

I'm thankful my parents took time out to have the "big talk" with me when I was a kid. I don't remember many details, but I remember feeling love spilling out of them as they told me about "the most beautiful, amazing thing in the world." I remember I felt safe and secure to talk to them about pretty much anything after that.

And now, as a parent, I am thankful for this book:Now, I'll be honest, I'm a little biased since my parents wrote it, but I'm telling you, it is a gem.

The whole concept is that parents should be the ones to teach their children about the birds and the bees...not their friend or a neighbor kid, or some random teacher at school during the sixth grade maturation schpeal.

These guys recommend that age eight is a great time to have "the talk" since at that age kids are pretty aware of their surroundings and can really grasp it, yet they are still innocent enough to be in awe of how amazing it all is. Sure, some kids need it sooner, some need it later, and parents are the best judge for that. Max "got it" perfectly, it all flew right on over Elle's head, (but she caught on after a few follow-up talks), and Grace was just in pure awe.

You see, it was Grace's turn last week. Finally, after six months of waiting because it seemed like things kind of got in the way, (and boy, it's kind of an easy thing to put off!).

When we do "the talk" (and I use the word "we" liberally because, well, I won't mention any names but one of the parents in this family stays pretty quiet), I pretty much have my nose buried in the book every other minute to make sure I'm covering all the bases (and, to be fair, that other member in the parenthood team here sure is good at following up when I forget stuff). There are a bunch of dialogs to draw from to explain things in a beautiful way. And there's a children's book they recommend to read together with your child that explains it all pretty well (except for a couple pages we kinda conveniently skip over because they're a little too much in my opinion).  Click here for more on that book.

As uncomfortable as it may seem like having "the big talk" will be, I have to admit I really do like it. I love that it opens up the door to talk about countless other things as they come up...things kids say at school, things on TV or in movies, questions that come up from jokes kids hear, etc., etc. I love that we have this strong base to build on and that my kids know that without a doubt they can come to us and ask us anything they ever wonder about.

We were worried about Grace because, let's be honest, this girl can't keep a secret to save her soul. So we had a series of "gear up" talks to let her know not to blab it all over the school. So far, no crazy calls from parents exasperated about her spilling the beans.

I'm still crossing my fingers...

(More about the book HERE .)
Related Posts with Thumbnails